A Lady Walks into a Bar…Old Glory Kitchen + Spirits

A Lady Walks into a Bar, Gabrielle Garofalo, Jersey Bites, Old Glory Kitchen + Bar, Keyport, Monmouth County

 A Lady Walks into a Bar, Gabrielle Garofalo, Jersey Bites, Old Glory Kitchen + Bar, Keyport, Monmouth CountyWhere I Was

Old Glory Kitchen + Spirits, Keyport, NJ

When, Exactly

Tuesday, July 30, 1:38 p.m.

Where I Sat

At the close end of the bar, which was some of the only free real estate! It was bustling as everyone worked to beat the heat with the cool breeze of central air on this sweltering summer afternoon. 

Who Served Me

Prudence. She strolled the bar as she took orders and wiped down the counter. Prudence casually served drinks and offered an easy smile. When you needed her, Prudence found you.

Bartender’s Favorite Bite

 A Lady Walks into a Bar, Gabrielle Garofalo, Jersey Bites, Old Glory Kitchen + Bar, Keyport, Monmouth CountyPrudence replied to my usual question with, “Well, what do you like?” I responded playfully, “That wasn’t the question, ‘Dear Prudence!’

She quickly reconsidered. “I really like the arugula salad with the crab cake,” she said. “There’s something about the cranberries and beets. I had never had white beets before; it’s so good and the crab cakes are amazing!”

The Vibe and My Vantage Point

Americana. A flag-inspired bar steeped in history. Beneath the well-polished veneer on the bar are newspaper clippings, historic postcards, and other artifacts about Keyport and, well, Old Glory. They’re likely worth a deeper look if you have the patience or attention span.

The bar and dining area are lively and come complete with TV screens hung above the bar. It was really hot on this particular day, otherwise I would’ve taken up residence at the outdoor bar, which included umbrella-covered table seating—a great option as we head toward fall.

I grabbed the seat closest to the front of the restaurant so I could take in all the action. Besides, there were hardly any open spots.

What Quenched My Thirst

 A Lady Walks into a Bar, Gabrielle Garofalo, Jersey Bites, Old Glory Kitchen + Bar, Keyport, Monmouth County
The Glory Chill

The Glory Chill, $9 

Deep Eddy ruby red grapefruit vodka and fresh lime juice, topped off with club soda and a lemon twist

I asked Prudence to replace the vodka with gin. For some reason, vodka tends to give me a headache and while I was only planning to sip one of these, I didn’t want to chance it.

The drink was super light and refreshing.

A touch of ruby red created a light pinkish tint and allowed the Hendrick’s to shine through—a botanical experience with the herbal notes of the gin, lime, and tart of the grapefruit. The right choice for the day!

What Fed My Soul

 A Lady Walks into a Bar, Gabrielle Garofalo, Jersey Bites, Old Glory Kitchen + Bar, Keyport, Monmouth County
Drunken clams

Drunken Clams, $12

Brick-oven roasted clams with garlic butter, cherry peppers, bacon and Yuengling lager, served with brick-oven crostini

A lovely portion arrived with a rich broth beneath the ample amount of clams and scarcely, scattered, sliced, wilted pieces of hot cherry peppers. What I didn’t see at first was the bacon, which I missed in the description as I excitedly jumped to the Yuengling lager.

The clams were well cooked, yet I found the broth a bit heavy-handed with the salt. I loved the cherry pepper touch and only wished for more to balance my tastebuds.

Lunch Combo, $7.99

Available weekdays at lunchtime and includes any sandwich or burger combined with soup, salad, or fries. My selection is detailed below.

 A Lady Walks into a Bar, Gabrielle Garofalo, Jersey Bites, Old Glory Kitchen + Bar, Keyport, Monmouth County
Roasted tomato bisque with a BLT

BLT, regularly $12

Served on toasted ciabatta and mayo 

The BLT arrived aside the bowl of tomato soup and looked amazing. Fluffy, sliced bread topped with healthy leaves of romaine, sliced tomatoes, and bacon. The mayo, which I got on the side, was lightly smeared on a single side of the well-toasted bread. I was delighted to sink my teeth into a hearty mouthful. Mmmmmm, hmmmmm. Where’s the bacon?! I am a proportion queen!

I was the kid that who, starting around age 7, would make tuna sandwiches with a side of sweet gherkins and “regular” Charles Chips, which were delivered on a truck. I’d bite the sandwich, bite a pickle, and eat a chip. The entire meal would go like that until I was done eating. Not a chip or pickle bite left to consume. OK, some may say that was OCD before it had a name, but I found it soothing and the best way to enjoy that particular early-foodie experience.

So in this case, I expected the depth of my bread to be matched with the thickness of the bacon. I was somewhat devastated to find they sort of skimped on that element of the experience. Had the of ingredients been more proportional, it would’ve been an even more delicious experience. It was yummy even if a little disappointing.

I think the deal for the combo is well worth heading back for. Next time I will check out another sandwich choice and try the fries! It’s clear the kitchen cares and the menu was created with the best intentions.

What’s on Tap

Clarence Clemons “Big Man’s Brew,” $7
New Jersey, IPA, 6.5% ABV

Evil Genius Purple Monkey Dishwasher, $6.50
Pennsylvania, Porter, 6.70% ABV

Sweetwater 420 Extra Pale Ale, $6
Georgia, Pale Ale, 5.4% ABV

Allagash White, $6.50
Maine, Witbier, .5.1% ABV

Blue Moon, $5.50
Colorado, Belgian Wheat Beer, 5.4 % ABV

Blue Moon Wheat, $5.50
Colorado Belgian Wheat, 5.4% ABV

Carton 077xx, $7
New Jersey, American Double/Imperial IPA, 7.8% ABV

Kane Head High, $7
New Jersey, American IPA, 6.5% ABV

Miller Lite, $3.50
Wisconsin, Light Lager, 4.2% ABV

Asbury Park Blonde, $7
New Jersey, Light Lager, 5.5% ABV

Yuengling Lager, $3.50
Pennsylvania American Amber / Red Lager, 4.5% ABV

Leinenkugal Berry Shandy, $5.50
Wisconsin, Weis Beer, 4.2% ABV

Yuengling Golden Pilsner, $4
Pottsville P.A., American Pilsner, 4.7% ABV

Founders Nitro Oatmeal Stout, $6.50
Michigan, English Oatmeal Stout, 4.5% ABV

Downeast Cider House Original Blend, $6.50
Massachusetts, Cider, 5.1% ABV
Samuel Adams Seasonal, $6
Massachusetts, German Märzen, 5.30% ABV

Selections may vary.

What’s Uncorked

Korbel (split), $9
Guerneville, California

Charles & Charles, $9
Colombia Valley, Washington

Chardonnay, $9
J Lohr – San Jose, California

Pinot Grigio, $9
Montevina Amador County, California
Sauvignon Blanc, $9
Joel Gott – California

Riesling, $9 
Kung Fu Girl – Washington

Cabernet Sauvignon, $9
Buried Cane – Colombia Valley, Washington$

Merlot $9
J. Lohr – Paso Robles, California

Pinot Noir, $9
Sea Glass – Santa Barbara, California 

Malbec, $9
Clay House – California 

Selections may vary.

What Else to Know

Daily specials, lunch combos, and live music create the scene at Old Glory. An incredible lower level offers a more intimate vibe, which I imagine gets packed on weekend nights. The pizza menu looked amazing and I plan to go back to take advantage of the happy hour specials soon! Definitely check out the website for when to show and what to know! BONUS! Old Glory is available on GrubHub, Seamless and DoorDash!

When to Show

Monday to Wednesday, 11:30 a.m. to midnight
Thursday to Saturday, 11:30 a.m. to 2:00 a.m.
Sunday, 11:00 a.m. to midnight

Know Before You Go!

Hours may change with the seasons. Please check the Old Glory Kitchen + Spirits website for the most up-to-date info.

Old Glory Kitchen + Spirits
84 Broad Street,
Keyport, NJ 07735

A Lady Walks into a Bar™ is owned and trademarked by Gabrielle Garofalo.