Pizza Town in Elmwood Park

I was on the way home from work Thursday, knowing full well that I had run out of supper supplies, when it occurred to me that with a slight adjustment to what is now becoming my habitually boring commuting route (now I know why they study rats in mazes), I could stop at yet another pizza joint on New Jersey Monthly’s top 25 list: Pizza Town on Rt. 46 W in what I believe to be Elmwood Park. (Run-on sentences rule!)

It was a dark and stormy night (not really but it sounds good) when I pulled into their parking lot that was obviously modeled after the 1916 Alsace-Lorraine school of landscape architecture.  After collecting all the bike parts gently loosened by the potholes, I entered through the “lets-add-more-space-to-this-dive-by-enclosing-the-outside-patio” doors and was confronted by my first set of choices:  Window #1, Window #2, Window #3, or head straight for the head. I propped my helmet up on the outdoor picnic benches that are now the indoor picnic benches (Kinda reverse redneck) and contemplated my choices.

Not having eaten yet, I decided to forgo the rest room experience. (Besides, I hate tipping those guys with the towels and cologne.) With an almost imperceptible adjustment to my gait (really I walked back and forth three times in a state of confusion), I shied away from the Whole Pies Only window, and the You-Better-Know-What-You’re-Doing-If-You’re-Gonna-Stand-Here Window, and sidled up to the Slices and Calzones Window.

As an interesting aside, they have a small calzone for a few dollars and a large one for $15.95! I may have to order that just to see.  Sounds like a challenge.

“Two slices, please.”

At $1.55 per slice, I could afford to eat out every night.

The pizza was sorta thin-crust but not at all like Kinchley’s. It happily reminded me of NYC/Jersey boardwalk pizza. The crust is thin and very crispy. You even get some of the previous guy’s pizza encrusted onto the bottom of your slice in the form of something reverting back to its basic carbon form. The sauce is good and the cheese is of a dietetic nature.

If you look in the dictionary under Pizza Town, you may not expect to find the word “ambiance.”   But for me it was déjà vu all over again. It was just like I remembered from the ‘60s.  Then again, after all that acid, I often remember things like they were yesterday, when in fact they never happened, or at least not to me.   That’s why I support cosmic consciousness.

I enjoyed the whole gestalt (including the pizza).  I say you oughta make it your next stop.   Herman, you’re right: pizza is a good thing.  This place gets 4 Helmets (my highest rating).

Phil Sikora’s “Reviews from the Road”

I have a T-shirt from a club for owners of Russian motorcycles that translates to: “Eat to ride; ride to eat.” I’ve taken that saying to heart. And so the stories, as the road, will unfold.